Thursday, March 31, 2011

The Tired Mommy Chronicles, Part III: CIO and "Married Time" :)

Hmmm....lots has happened since my last post. After the last non-successful attempt at CIO we gave it a couple days break and had her back in bed with us. She'd had a runny nose and was sneezing and it's definitely not right to start CIO when a baby is sick at all. Tuesday she seemed much better and had no illness symptoms. She passed out on me around 7:30pm and I went to place her in her crib. As is her usual the second I laid her down flat she woke up and started screaming. Oh dear, here we go again! We gave it 15 minutes and then Craig went in to offer her pacifier. She was too upset and wouldn't even take it. Another 15 minutes and then I went in to check on her. As I was in there talking to her and singing to her she projectile vomited! It flew out of her mouth and then her breathing stopped for a moment as more was in her throat. I sat her up quickly and the rest came out. Oh. My. Gosh. So then it was an impromptu bathtime and no way in heck we were going to make her cry again that night. She slept happily in bed with us, again. So, while this is all going on and CIO seems to be a dismal failure I've had this little gut nudge that something is off. Maybe her ears again? So yesterday morning I called her pediatrician and they got us in that day. I was totally right, poor little bugger has a double ear infection. I asked if we could just do garlic mullein oil so the ped took a closer look. Unfortunately, there was no movement and also puss was starting to build :( Past the garlic oil stage. Bummer. She's now on 5 days of Zithromax. So, the ear infection explains possibly why she hates laying flat. I'm glad I trusted my gut and had stopped doing CIO with her. Poor baby! Our pediatrician recommended waiting at least 5 days for the meds to clear her ears and then try CIO just at naptime. Feed, burp and change her and then put her in her crib. Let her cry til she falls asleep. She suggested waiting a month to do CIO at nighttime as she just doesn't seem emotionally ready. Ps. I love my ped. She suppports homebirths, breastfeeding, and hasn't given me any crap about the fact that little Evie has had zero vaccinations :)

There was a post today on the Facebook page EDD and the mom was saying her scenario with her 4 month old that only sleeps if she's with mom, day and night. Sound familier? Um, yeah. Most of the commenters said how awful CIO is and that it's child abuse. Even saying that mother's who do CIO become dull to the needs of their children and that the child is harmed for life and may become agressive or withdrawn. I take offense to that! I did CIO with Eliana and she is one of the gentlest, sweetest children I know. She also sleeps 12-14 hours at night every night :) I believe that each child is different and as mothers we need to do what we believe in our heart is best for them. My little Evangeline is such a mommy's girl. She is very sensitive to where I am and cries when I leave the room. She needs the security of knowing her mommy and 'food source' is right near her. However, that doesn't mean she needs to sleep in my bed for the next 2 years. We're on a CIO "pause" and will try again in a month. Our ped said to give it a 3 night trial. If the 3rd night is better than the 1st, then continue, baby should be going to sleep with no tears in about a week. If the 3rd night is worse than the 1st, take a break and give it another month. There are a lot of way to get a baby to go to sleep. I will not talk harshly about the mother that has 5 kids in her bed and that same mother should not talk harshly about the mother who does not want 5 kids in her bed. Right?

One topic that no one writes about but has a lot to do with babies and their sleep habits is, how the heck do mommy and daddy have 'married time' (hehe) when baby will only sleep in the nook of mommy's arm? Yup, we're talking sex and I brought it up :) The marriage relationship is hugely important as is our husbands knowing they are special to us. My husband takes a huge backseat whenever we have a kid and that's pretty normal. Having a baby is all consuming. That being said I don't think our husbands should be relegated to a whole different car (if we're speaking in automobile analogies). Know what I mean? We're in this together and we need to be a team. It's not me and the baby against him. So, talking to other mommies I've asked, "what do you do, how you still have sex when baby will only sleep with you!?"
Put baby in a swing for a little while
Put baby in a carseat on the floor near the bed (hey, they won't remember it)
Once baby is passed out slide your arm out and go be 'married' in another room

So yes, we are all being crazy together and trying to appease our precious little bundles of joy! :) They are completely worth it, it's not even a question, but we still need to find those moments of fun and sanity while life is in the crazy newborn/infant stage :)

I'll also add that my little one is 18lbs 2oz (110 percentile)! And has officially doubled her 9lb 1oz birth weight. She is also 25 1/4 inches (75-90 percentile). She is huge! And totally perfect. It's nearly impossible to overfeed a breastfed baby and she doesn't nurse all that often anyhow. Her head is 17 1/4 inches (90 percentile) which is so big but I guess when you consider her head at birth was 14 3/4 inches (I know, I'm amazing, lol) it makes sense. She's a big, chubby, cuddly, gorgeous girl!

1 comment:

  1. Do what you have to do to have a healthy and happy marriage. Things may not be so spicy in the months after baby but they should have some seasoning! :D

    I don't think there's anything wrong with using your bed when the LO is sleeping in it on occasion.