Sunday, January 22, 2012

It Will Not Be Unredeemed

My heart is so heavy for a friend today. She lost her baby girl yesterday at 38 weeks. Beautiful angel baby Mya is being born today. I just can't even imagine what my friend is facing right now. A friend and co-worker of mine lost her baby girl at 38 weeks about a decade ago and I remember the deep deep sorrow they faced and the stress of planning a memorial and all the funeral arrangements. Not at all what someone 38 weeks thinks they will find themselves doing.

In moments like these there aren't really any words that seem to fit. Everything feels too small and not enough and trite no matter how sincere we are. But yet ignoring (by not saying anything) someone's loss carries with it it's own pain. It's different but I remember feeling that way after Craig's accident. Many people seemed to just fall off the face of the earth. They didn't call or come visit or talk to me if they saw me out in public. They just didn't know what to say, but I felt shunned and alone in my pain.

A friend of mine who recently suffered losing her own sweet baby wrote a blog about how to help a friend who has lost a baby. Read Rachel's blog HERE. Thank you Rachel :)

Life can be so messy and painful. Yes, we know there is joy even in the midst of trial, but sometimes the trials waterboard us and we are doing all we can just to take a breath. Life is so heavy right now for so many people. My mother in law is back at Virginia Mason after having another problem with her feeding tube. She still has stage 4 cancer. My sister in law is having to relearn how to live after becoming a widow 4 weeks ago.  And now my sweet friend has to deal with losing her baby girl. I feel raw and it's in these moments that I wonder when life will feel "normal" again. It's been messy for what feels like so long and people I care about keep suffering. Jesus carries us through these times, I do know that. In the pain we just do all we can to throw ourselves at Him and surrender and allow Him to carry us. This song is beautiful and so true:

1 comment:

  1. Thank you for your post. I have started praying much more these days just for Jesus to come back soon and heal all of our hearts and make everything right again. I am glad that we have Him to hold onto in the meantime. Still praying and grieving for the loss of Mya.